Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I’m trying not to think about you
Can’t you just let me be?
Have you ever felt like that? Have you had an “almost” dream or an “almost” plan? Maybe an almost friend, almost dream come true, almost success… Something you loved or wanted that left just before its culmination. I can think of a few of those. My plans kind of lay shattered around me. I envisioned my life looking very different. In my dream everything was pretty. Everyone was happy, no worries, no pain. Just success and triumph. But life doesn’t always look like that. Life gets rough on occasion. Life gets messy. All. The. Time. And maybe that’s not so bad. Maybe the mess holds more joy than the clean. Maybe your stress just means your working for something worthwhile. Maybe your failed dream wasn’t good for you. Just like the song, you’re going to have to grieve that loss.
What a strange concept. To grieve over plans, intentions, and desires… But I think of it like this. When you want something, and you want it badly, you spend time thinking about it. You spend time planning around it. In essence, you spend time with your dream. When it “leaves” you or doesn’t work out, it’s going to feel like a breakup. A part of your life is getting ripped away. And that isn’t so much fun. But the truth is, there is nothing pretty when you lose something or someone. It hurts. So once again, I’m back on my knees. I’m back to consciously taking ownership of God’s promises. I’m choosing to hold dear His promise of love. I find comfort in His promise of protection. I believe He will do as He has promised. He will fight for me. He gives me what I need to make most of Him. He holds the plans. He is in control all the time. He loves me.
The book of Psalms offers a great example of how life looks. Many of the Psalms were written by King David and through his writing you can see his highs (joyful, praise filled poems) to his lows which focus on persecution, sin, and sadness. Life has both joy and pain. If there’s one thing I want to get across to y’all today it is that there’s great joy amidst great pain. Joy is not happiness. It’s a deep-rooted contentedness that only the Lord can provide. It stems from the Holy Spirit and a deep trust in the Lord. So grieve your dreams or “almost things,” but don’t stay there. Keep pursuing the Lord and His promises. Pray for joy. Pray for trust.
What promises do you need to believe today? Meditate on those my friends. Live them out. Fill your heart with them. (Personally, I like writing them on my arms. Just a suggestion!)